Wednesday, May 21, 2008

what's your thoughts on self esteem

This week is going ok. Been too busy for my own good with tests and now a paper due Friday and a big speech to give! I really hate public speaking but it is a small group. I did it last quarter and I survived and suppose I will this time too. I'm just feeling I don't know the subject matter as much as last time so I'll read some more before then and make note cards or something. It only has to be 10-15 minute speech.....wonderful.

Today, I am thinking about self esteem. First, I was thinking of it as I was reading Hilly's post at snackiepoo.com about how people make self-depreciating remarks about themselves. Maybe as a way to joke or maybe as a way to protect themselves from whatever comment they may make to hurt you. I was also thinking of this cause at my clinical site where I intern for my future career they said a while ago "have more confidence". Yeah, I guess, I feel that I could use more confidence but I feel I'll get it when I get used to doing more xray and especially after the summer when I'm interning 5 times/week that quarter. So, anyway, I was suprised when I was talking to my teacher, well really the tech at work that is one of them who is teaching me and we were talking about the hospital where I might be assigned to next year. I said there is XY hospital that I don't want due to the reputation. Now this hospital has so many stories from people I know and people I've heard of that have gotten mistreated there and so much negative people there so that's why I don't want it. My teacher/tech say "yeah, I hope you don't get it cause with you self confidence, blah blah....it wouldn't be a good fit for you" Something to that effect. Anyway, can't remember if she said self-confidence or what but it made me think. Hmmmmmm.....is that how she really sees me as a student? I suppose so or she wouldn't have said it. Is this something I can change? This lady did her interning at said hospital and hated it. So, anyway, I was thinking, that I will have loads more confidence in my abilities by January when I switch intern sites. I guess, I felt a little down as I felt like she was saying that I'm not a confident person. Maybe I'm not but I feel like I am in certain areas and not so much in other areas as I was talking about it previous posts of mine.

Anyway, what's your thought on this? Is confidence related to self esteem? Can you change something like that about yourself? Have any of you done that? I think I can in relation to the school and interning as it's a high learning curve and I always feel like I'm on edge and you get lots of critisicm. It's just the way it is to learn the profession.

And I was thinking....when I was younger, I had more confidence, more self esteem. It seems when my weight crept up and I had some other problems in my life, I took a beating. I changed a bit. I don't like it now that I think about it. Here's hoping I can get back to who I once was.

Anyway.....some days I wish I were someone else. And other days I think I'm fine just the way I am. In the wt loss front, I'm holding steady and no progress this week. I'm going to the gym here soon with my son and hope to get some kind of workout. Talk to ya later.

5 comments:

Sizzle said...

I have always been mistaken for someone with a lot of confidence. When I was younger I kind of just faked it and the fact that I have a big personality, like to make people laugh, and overcompensate readily for other people's nervousness probably made it seem like I hadn't a care in the world.

I am pretty confident now but I always, always falter when it comes to my body image and my weight. Always.

celtic_girl said...

Confidence and self esteem definately go hand in hand. Yes, you can change the way you think about yourself - through positive self talk. It's like a habit once you do it and keep it up it becomes second nature. It's hard to to do though.

jodi said...

personally, i think confidence and self-esteem are very similiar - sort of like, you can't have one without the other... i went thru some mild depression in my late-20s and had serious issues dealing with those two things... i was always afraid to speak my mind or voice my opinion and i soon realized, that i have every right to do so and should take advantage of that... therapy helped tremendously and i have to say, weight didn't have any bearing on what i was going thru (though i was overweight)...

so in answering your question - yes, you can totally change/improve this about yourself with a little time, a little patience, and a lot of self-love... :o)

Chris H said...

As already commented on... self confidence and self esteem go hand in hand...

Spider63 said...

Confidence and self-esteem are both related. You have to build them both up every day. Usually by setting very small goals every day and achieving them. Also setting bigger goals and working to achieve those. Your career move should be building up your self-esteem. That is a confidence builder! I guess the fact that your supervisor is not building you up is one negative, but that is normal. Most people do not build up other people.